mr. T

today i had my very first experience with turkish coffee cup reading.

i drank a cup of steaming hot turkish coffee and then tipped over the cup onto its plate. the school's cleaning lady collected it from me and told me to come back in half an hour - and with a translator...

so, after class i went to the teachers room and asked one girl who looked particularly cheerful whether she could help and we ended up in the tiny kitchenette at the top floor where the aforementioned cleaning lady goes to smoke her muratti cigarettes.

she lifted my cup and started saying: "you get rid of all stress in your life" which did not sound extraordinary... she then added quite whimsically... "i see that all your relatives are veeeeery happy. you family members are veeeeeery happy. the ones close to you are. the ones far away from you are. all your relatives are veeeeeery happy" - they sure are, i rather meekly conceded - (...but what about me...?? i sort of screamed inside).

she went on to explain... "i see a key at the bottom of the cup. you are going to buy something BIG" -

like an elephant? a hot air baloon? a grizzly bear?, i tried to joke -

oblivious to the humour she replied, sternly... "no, it is either a car or a house".

"to be honest, i cant see that happening any time soon..." i mentioned, politely.

she responded it was meant to happen "at some point in your life".

"...ok" i conceded, i guess looking like a disappointed babboon - "can you see anything else??" i continued.

and she whispered "...i see that your life is full of people... and that there is a man... a man..." - which spurred the enthusiasm of my translator "a MAN??"

"yes" the cup reader explained "a man whose name begins by T"

"T?? i am not close to any man whose initial is T..." i told her - but my protest went slightly unnoticed "t... T... T needs your help... he is going to ask you something..."

"alright" i said rather unenthusiastically... thinking that i was being told:

- my family was happy;

- i was about to purchase an old beat of a trailer, a rhino or a copycat of the Enola Gay or something similar:

- mr. T was going to nag me with some request

blast.

note to self... never try bloody cup reading again!

"anything else?" i tried, with the conclusive tone of somebody trying to wrap up things.

"ha!" the cleaning lady gave me a happy look and then asked with sparkling eyes:

"does anybody close to you suffer from any heart condition?"

to which i turned to my (still cheerful, i noticed) translator and said...:

"i think we can... kind of... go on another time...??"